Nissan's new two minutes of pure drool-inducing lasciviousness with the BladeGlider concept is one of those snippets without any narration that sort of grabs you and makes you watch. Within the first ten seconds, the sountrack tells you exactly what this is going to be and you know you're going to have to see it all, even if you have the itching feeling that it's somehow wrong for you to cheat like that.
Before we get into the contents of the video, breathtakingly wah-wah pedaled as they are, I have to make a confession. One that will rock your perception of me as a car guy.
My first crush was on Wonder Woman, the only superhero that didn't have a car.
That's right. As a kid, I was totally in love with Wonder Woman and her invisible jet. Actually, I think I was mostly in love with Linda Carter and the whole superheroine outfit thing was just a side note to that. Hard to tell. My major mode of transportation at the time was a Big Wheel. With the handbrake, thank you. I wasn't exactly an expert in the nuances of love or transportation. I thought everyone in the world owned a tractor, a pickup truck, and a station wagon because everyone who lived around us did.
Thinking back, I don't think it was until the A-Team that I finally noticed cars as a central character in film and television. But hey, if you're gonna have a first automotive love from TV, it may as well be a GMC van that's magically bulletproof and is driven by a guy with a mohawk who randomly moves the steering wheel while he calls someone in the back seat "fool" and "sucka."
So fast forward from that point through all of the DB5s (Bond, James Bond), Trans Ams (..a shadowy flight into the dangerous world of a man who does not exist.), Chargers (Just the good ol' boys..), Dodge vans (Rooby Rooby Rooo!), Pacers (I'm just a poor boy from a poor family!), and DeLoreans (Where we're going, we don't need roads..) to today and this BladeGlider short.
Well, maybe I'm overselling it. It's hard to say. Perhaps Nissan just hopes to sell a lot of these in the same way Traci Lords films sold. You know how that goes. Or perhaps they really are onto something with this concept they've promised to turn into production reality. If it's anything like this, it will induce bleary-visioned heart pumping akin to the way we feel when the lights are dim and the ice cream is all gone..
You decide: